Hello Underdogs. I know that I have been absent recently. It’s with a heavy heart that I must say that my beloved dog, Indy has passed away. This by far has been one of the hardest things that I have gone through and I am broken. I have lost dogs before, but Indy was my best buddy in the whole world, and it hurt worse than I could ever imagine. For those who think I don’t know real loss, I know it all too well. I lost all my grandparents, my Dad, and some very good friends during the course of my life. It makes me upset when people say that you “just lost a dog.” I didn’t just lose my dog, I lost my best friend. Grief isn’t measured in a person, or a pet, but by how much you loved. If you are lucky, your life will be filled with grief.
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I had Indy with me since he was a baby. We went through so much together. He literally saved my life twice, and it almost cost him his very own life both times. He slept with me every night. He traveled with me all over the USA. He moved with me in several places and several states. My one regret is that I could never afford a place to live that had a fence in yard where he could run and play as much as he wanted. He was by my side during the worst moments including the loss of his sister, Poe, and my Dad.
There has never been another soul as pure and as wonderful as Indy. He wasn’t the smartest crayon in the box, but he sure was pretty. He had a huge bark, but was a big snuggler. Indy would moo like a cow sometimes, loved his ears rubbed, and enjoyed cheeseburgers. He was a great brother, a wonderful friend, and part of my soul. Anyone who has lost a pet understands how hard it is to walk into your house, and feel so alone. Even though I do have another dog, my life feels so empty and alone now. I love Sunny so very much, but of course, she isn’t, and never has been a replacement for Indy. You can never replace an animal, you can get another one, but it doesn’t take away the loss and pain of your beloved lost animal.
That’s all I want to say for now. I’m not taking this so well, and that is the truth of the matter. Each day hurts, and it gets further and further away from the last day I had him in my life. It gets worse. Grief is very real, and very hard. What I learned is that I need to take my own time. I can cry and hurt because it’s okay. I can also want to be alone because things have become too much. I can also be happy too. One day, I will be better, but today is not that day, and it may not be that day for a very long time. Indy was with me for 12 years, and I’m thankful for every moment. There are no words to express how much I loved my dog, and how much I miss him.
Goodbye my baby, Indy. I will miss you for the rest of my life. Thank you for letting me be your person.
***If you are able to help, please check out my go fund me page to donate to Indy’s Burial Fund: